hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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