True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Randomize
