Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize