North Korea, Best Korea!
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
