i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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