This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
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