There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
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