Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
I just threw up on my dentist
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
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