i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
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