What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
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