Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want my vagina anymore.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
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