i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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