Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Randomize
