About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Randomize
