She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
Randomize
