how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
ttyl tear gas
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Randomize
