Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize
