Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
