Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
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