I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Randomize
