tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
