I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Randomize