My brain says no but my pants say off.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
I need a beard to bite.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
