He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
