i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
the day after is always just damage control
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
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