Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
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