everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Randomize
