We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
