It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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