there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Randomize
