I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Just puked most of my soul out..
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize
