My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
i used baking grease as lip gloss
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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