You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
