New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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