She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
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You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
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I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
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