I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
