she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
It's not a walk of shame if you run
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Randomize
