i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
