Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
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