we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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