I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
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