in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
I got inside last night via doggy door
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
