Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
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