You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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