matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
I am naked and annoyed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
I'm both gender and math confused
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize