I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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