What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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