Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
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