I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
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