First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
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